Editorial

1. Of Cameras and Phones

   24 January, 2005:

   My current mobile phone is a Nokia 6310i. I’ve owned it for a couple of years now, and it’s in perfect working order. I like this phone. It fits nicely in my hand, has a good weight to it, is easy to use, the buttons are of a sane size and it has a nice business-like appearance. It is a man’s phone. A gentleman’s phone. I wanted a camera. To do this, I would have to get a new phone.

   13 comments

2. First Few Days at Work

   12 January, 2005:

   To begin; to minimise the possibilities of friction between Joeblade and my new employer, I will not be referring to any individuals I work with, nor will I refer to the company by name. Henceforth, the company shall be referred to only as ‘The Company’.

   6 comments

3. Five Nights in Oxford

   9 January, 2005:

   Actually, no nights in Bangkok, but isn’t it a good song? I’m now writing from Oxford, having moved here a few days ago. Internet access is back to being available via my mobile phone until I and my housemates can sort out some sort of wireless shenanigans, but I’ve slummed it before so I can slum it again.

   1 comment

4. Ebay

   31 December, 2004:

   Ahh, Ebay. We’ve spent such happy times together. Remember, years ago, when I bought a ZX Spectrum? Frantically pressing ‘refresh’ as somebody else bid against me during the closing seconds. Spent more than I’d planned, but wasn’t that always the way?

   2 comments

5. 2005 Predictions

   30 December, 2004:

   Before they were famous, I had heard of both Franz Ferdinand and The Zutons. I admit, not long before — we’re only talking about a year at most — but it bothered me that I had no documentary evidence of this, so that when people could talk to me about this cool new band they’d seen on CD-UK, I could just sigh, and refer them to my year-old enthusing, perhaps with a casual wave of the hand and a sip of mint julep. I could have been so annoying. I probably was anyway.

   3 comments

6. Accommodated

   21 December, 2004:

   Well, I finally found a place to live in Oxford, so it looks like I’m all set. I say ‘finally’, as if I’ve spent months on this search, but it was actually only a few days. It felt longer, though.

   2 comments

7. Employed Again

   9 December, 2004:

   As of January 10th, 2005, I’ll be taking up a position as a Web Producer in Oxford. Which is nice.

   11 comments

8. Amazon Recommends

   30 October, 2004:

   Amazon recommendations used to be more useful — there were times I would even buy CDs that they recommended. It’s a simple concept; track what the customer has purchased in the past, and with a bit of cross-referencing to what other people who bought the same items also bought, serve up a list of recommendations. Cunning. But what does it take to ruin the entire system?

   5 comments

9. Sex and the Seaside

   29 October, 2004:

   I visited my home town recently, for the first time in about four or five years, and was pleasantly surprised at the various attempts to introduce a touch of class to the place. What was once, long ago, a thriving seaside resort had declined steadily over the years to become a grubby tourist trap for visitors from Birmingham and a second home for recovering heroin addicts. It’s happened to a lot of the smaller coastal resorts as the typical British holiday now takes place abroad, depriving British towns of the much-needed tourist revenue (and presumably also forcing Ken Dodd to seek other work, so it’s not all bad).

   9 comments

10. Dial I for Irritated

    21 September, 2004:

    As I prepare for my imminent move from one side of the country to the other, I’m forced to contact a variety of organisations that have my existing address, so they know where to find me when they want their money back.

    4 comments

11. The Art of Rejection

    8 September, 2004:

    We’ve all, at some point in our lives, faced some sort of rejection, be it from a company, a potential partner, a transplanted organ or a surrogate mother.

    Rejections for job applications are perhaps the most common, and we learn to deal with them; the first one hurts, the second one is easier, and when you hit double figures you just take it in your stride and plough on. The formality of the job application rejection helps, the sterility of the response, the lack of sincerity and the vague promise to keep you on record. “Dear <INSERT APPLICANT NAME HERE>”…you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.

    4 comments

12. The Gym

    20 August, 2004:

    There was a time, several years ago, when I was a skinny little bast. Upon arriving at university, 6 years ago, my shirts were a medium size and my meals were tiny.

    The student lifestyle — particularly, the geek student lifestyle — took its toll, as did the subsequent professional geek lifestyle, and I managed to almost double my weight. For this reason, approximately three months ago, I bit the bullet (a chocolate one, natch) and joined a gym.

    5 comments

13. Resignation

    28 June, 2004:

    Dear John,

    As required by my contract of employment, I hereby give you three months notice of my intention to leave my position as Information Support Officer. I intend my last day of employment to be Tuesday 28th of September 2004.

    Yours sincerely,

    paul haine
    Information Support Officer

    Tick tock, tick tock…

    6 comments

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