All articles by Paul Haine
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London Underground
14 March, 2010: Too many bad experiences on the London Underground have given me cause to abandon it entirely; now I get around London via walking or bus alone.
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Why BBC 6 Music matters
7 March, 2010: BBC Director General Mark Thompson has recommended to the BBC Trust that digital radio station 6 Music be closed down. As someone who has religiously tuned into this station since it first started broadcasting a decade ago, I’m a bit upset by this.
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I’m here about some monkeys
21 February, 2010: A recent viewing of Terry Gilliam’s Twelve Monkeys, a film I’ve seen several times since its release in 1995, left me wondering if, despite some appealing cyclical time-travel logic, it doesn’t deliver quite enough of a mindfuck.
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Decaffeinated
9 February, 2010: Feeling in an experimental and somewhat jittery mood, I decided to stop drinking coffee for a short spell, to see what would happen.
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The Road
24 January, 2010: I'm not opposed in principle to the post-apocalyptic in entertainment, but I'm not one that can just appreciate the devastation for its own artistic merit; I need a human element as well otherwise it feels as if the apocalypse is being fetishised, as in a Roland Emmerich film; all special effects and showboating and rubbing one's thighs as we see famous monuments pulverised.
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My first 999
17 January, 2010: I was once again near a traffic accident, though this time I'm not taking the blame as I wasn't thinking about anything much at the time beyond the lyrics to Nancy Sinatra's Some Velvet Morning. What made this accident notable, though, was that this time I was first on the scene. Aside from the victim, obviously.
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I went to the theatre
24 December, 2009: Recently I wrote about how the theatre was this odd, unfamiliar world, so full of strange terminology and mad prices that it left me cold and confused. In the name of investigative journalism I decided I should at least give it a go before writing it off. I ponyed up the extortionat ticket price for a front-row seat at Breakfast at Tiffany's and off I went.
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My best and worst films of 2009
21 December, 2009: Most organisations and blogging outlets appear to be compiling bumper fun lists detailing the best films, games, songs, photos, deaths etc. from the entire decade. This strikes me as a bit of an unlikely goal; I struggle to narrow these things down to the best whatever of the last five minutes myself. Nevertheless, here's my attempt at listing my best and worst films of 2009, in no particular order of preference and with little attempt to round to the nearest ten.
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Furnished
13 December, 2009: Yesterday, after living in the same barely-furnished flat for nearly three years, I finally caved and bought an extra dining chair, two bedside tables and one coffee table. They don't match, they're as cheap as I could find from IKEA's online store (the really cheap stuff demands a car and a personal visit) and I will happily leave them behind when I next move. Nevertheless, the decision to buy was one I agonised over for about a year.
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Yesterday Was a Lie trailer
12 December, 2009: I’m a sucker for blondes, noir and Chase Masterson so this really does hit most of my buttons.
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Ink trailer
22 November, 2009: Hard to describe. Something about dreams and nightmares. Low-budget indie. Looks good. Just watch the trailer.
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Sunday morning gaming
8 November, 2009: Most of my gaming is done on a weekend; I find weekday evenings I'm usually too tired to really dedicate the stupid amount of hours a typical game requires, so I binge over Saturday and Sunday. When Sunday morning comes and I slump on the sofa in my dressing gown, a mug of builder's tea by my side, the games I play have to meet a few requirements.
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I play games on easy
10 October, 2009: I've recently come to terms with my inability at playing any game with any skill; from now on, I'm playing games on the easy difficulty settings and I don't care who knows it.
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Cooking with tongue
3 October, 2009: An important part of being a card-carrying member of the North London glitterati is the ability to harp on like a tedious idiot about buying the cheaper, more hilarious cuts of meat from the butcher rather than relying on neatly-packaged and sanitised lumps from Sainsbury's. I've been letting the side down in that respect, so here's a story about how I tried to cook some ox tongue the other day.
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A Nightmare on Elm Street teaser trailer
28 September, 2009: Jackie Earle Haley picks up the Krueger mantle as the Elm Street franchise gets rebooted.
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I don’t know how to go to the theatre
25 September, 2009: Going to the theatre isn't something I've ever done in any major way. I think the last time I went to the theatre was to see Blues Brothers: The Musical six or seven years ago and I ended up walking out during the interval as my spider-sense had picked up on the audience participation that was due in the second half.
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Review of Inglourious Basterds
13 September, 2009: It's hard to imagine how my expectations could have been any lower going in to Inglourious Basterds. Savaged by the critics and created by the man whose last film, Death Proof, bored me so much I resorted to fast-forwarding through entire scenes for fear of falling asleep, I only ended up seeing Basterds as I was on holiday and needed something to fill an evening with.
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Review of District 9
5 September, 2009: Neill Blomkamp's debut feature of an alien slum in the city of Johannesburg is an impressive action film, though lacking in substance and any real depth despite the rich sense of history and place it has to draw on.
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Ridley Scott and James Cameron return to science fiction
23 August, 2009: Ridley Scott has announced that he's returning to the Alien universe that he created to direct a prequel to Alien, and footage from James Cameron's Avatar has finally been seen by the public. Should we care?
