Six Apart to buy Livejournal
It has been announced that Six Apart, the company that owns Movable Type and Typepad, have purchased Livejournal. Obviously, we can expect some changes.
Changes for users of Livejournal:
- From now on, every journal will find itself flooded with comment spam; this policy will be backdated to the very start of your journal. Expect approximately 100–500 spams daily. Tools will be provided to allow you to delete this spam, one item at a time, followed by a compulsory ‘re-build’ of your journal.
- Everyone who owns a Livejournal will find themselves compelled to drink at least one latté per day. This must be purchased from Starbucks, and contain a mixture of milk, sugar, cream, and approximately 0% actual coffee.
- Every other journal post must now be about one of the following approved topics:
- Firefox.
- CSS.
- Thunderbird.
- Flickr.
- del.icio.us.
- RSS.
- Podcasting.
- Ownership of a piece of Apple-branded hardware is now mandatory.
Changes for users of Movable Type:
- Users will be compelled to take at least one “What sort of…?” online test on a daily basis. Results of these tests will form the basis of the user’s personality.
- Users must now firmly affiliate themselves with at least one of the following cultural groups:
- Furries.
- Goths.
- Tori Amos fans.
- Christians.
- Anime fans.
- Nu-punk/nu-metal fans.
- Users must now write like infants at least one day per week. For instance, use ‘pwease’ instead of ‘please’, and ‘me want pie’ instead of ‘I would like lunch’.
Changes to take effect immediately.